Happiness is knowing that you are enough. But the question is, do you think you’re enough? Do you think you are enough to handle all the responsibilities in life? Do you believe you will ever be enough?
These questions haunt everyone because they are all about judgment, sometime we all dislike. Sure we dislike it but we’re aware that it’s happening to us all the time or at least we imagine that it is. I believe that in this case our imaginations are working overtime. No doubt we are being judged all the time, the tone of that judgment, I’m convinced is much worse in our heads.
Therein lies the rub, our happiness is linked to our attachment to what others think and our need for approval. Those who are self-realized, that is comfortable in “their own skin” don’t need or seek the approval of others.
How do you become a self-actualized person? Well there are a number of practices such as meditation or becoming conscious of the moments when you judge others. People who judge others consistently are the ones who always are feeling judged and believe they’re not enough.
In her article on how to be enough, Paige Burke, some sage advice…enjoy.
Judgment is the opposite of acceptance and approval.
We judge others against our expectations and others do the same to us. We humans seem to have a hard time accepting people and environments as they are.
We judge everything as better or (more likely) worse that our expectations. This says something about how frequently our expectations are off base, yet we cling to them as “right.”
These judgments wreak havoc on our happiness.
If things and people aren’t as we expect (and they usually aren’t), then we decide that we can’t be happy. That’s a sure-fire recipe for a lifetime of unhappiness.
What Is Enough?
We judge ourselves as not enough in so many ways. Not pretty, smart, tall, thin, rich, powerful, confident (you get the picture) enough.
What is enough anyway?
Who gets to decide what enough is and why should we listen to them?
For most of us, enough is never enough. We’re so busy trying to be something other than who and what we are in the present moment.
We constantly judge ourselves as not what we should be. As a result, we’re always striving for something else. Unfortunately, we have no idea what that “something else” is.
It’s time to slow down and define what enough means to us. Where are we headed so fast?
Nobody “out there” gets to decide what enough means for us. Only we can decide for ourselves.
And, until we decide, we’ll never be enough or have enough. Without a goal or end point clearly defined, our lives will be all about the chase with a constant uneasiness about “never getting there.”
If we don’t know where “there” is, we’ll never arrive.
Enough is Enough!
It’s time to end this race to nowhere.
Defining what enough means for us requires us to accept ourselves for who and what we are.
By creating an achievable destination, we’re agreeing that there will be an end to the striving for more and we’ll have to be content with things as they are.
Are you ready to do that? If not, why not?
If you are ready, can you decide that you’re there now? If not, why not?
Society programs us to believe that more, bigger and better is the goal and that this goal is never achievable. As soon as we get or become more, we’re supposed to get and be more on top of that. Where does it end?
I’m not saying that we should stop living, growing and experiencing all that life can offer. Not at all.
I’m suggesting that we stop judging ourselves as not enough. Stop killing ourselves to be something different. Instead, let’s enjoy the process of growing for its own sake instead of doing it to achieve an unachievable goal of what others think we should be.
So what if we’re not meeting someone else’s expectations? That person probably isn’t meeting their own expectations of themselves.
What will happen if we don’t get the complete acceptance and approval from the important people in our lives?
Answer: Our lives will be exactly as they are today. Continue reading here…
When you shift your focus to your strengths and release the negative energy in your life without judgment, then you are practicing self-realization, which is a fancy way of saying that you’re ok with who you are.
You are enough and happiness is knowing that you are enough.